For higher or worse, social media is now a fixture in our lives. It influences how we socialize, work, and join with our communities. It’s practically not possible to reside with out, and I’m typically tremendous envious of people that don’t use it in any respect. In 2023, there have been an estimated 4.9 billion social media customers worldwide, with the typical individual spending 145 minutes on social media daily. I don’t learn about you, however I can consider much better issues to do than spend 2+ hours on my telephone every day.
It’s wild to suppose that social media didn’t exist within the kind it did now after I began my profession as an Leisure Publicist in 2005. On the time, we had MySpace, however it wasn’t near how we now use social platforms. One yr later, Twitter (now X) would attain the cultural zeitgeist, and we’d start to grasp how shortly the world was related.
Featured picture from our interview with Sanetra Nere Longno.
As a result of I’ve chosen a profession that depends closely on social media and staying in control on developments, I’m always re-evaluating and readjusting my conduct and limits with numerous platforms. It’s taken a couple of iterations, plus quite a lot of reflection on my time and utilization, however I landed in a great place as soon as I began asking myself a couple of key questions and shifting my conduct in game-changing methods.
Now, these are the social media “guidelines” and limits I apply to make sure my relationship with my platforms stays wholesome—a supply of connection and inspiration.
Buddies Get Information Earlier than Strangers
This one is straightforward, however no enormous life occasion or change will hit social media earlier than my inside circle, pricey associates, or household will get the information. I’ve largely determined to maintain that sort of information off of social media anyway in order that a big chunk of my private life stays non-public. Nonetheless, if I’m going to share any type of replace, I take a beat earlier than posting.“Do my finest girlfriends learn about this?” If the reply is not any, it doesn’t get shared.
Am I keen to interact with what I’m sharing?
I LOVE to share a great deal. Whether or not it’s a candle dupe, a steal on an ideal costume, or a product I really really love—it’s all truthful recreation. However, these types of posts typically garner loads of questions and responses. So I ask myself earlier than posting: Am I keen to interact? If the reply is not any, I don’t put up something. I really like being useful and need to really feel that my neighborhood can depend on me, but when I’m drained or depleted and gained’t take time to reply, I merely don’t put up about it.
Holidays are for Staying Current
Camille did an unbelievable job of this when she traveled for her fortieth birthday. She was very intentional upfront about disconnecting, even sharing in her publication that she was deleting the Instagram app whereas away. What a present to provide your self.
Right here’s how I see it. If I’m spending hundreds of {dollars} on touring, particularly someplace new, solely to be on my telephone the complete time… effectively, I might’ve carried out that at house. This has been an enormous apply for me, however I choose to take all the images I can on my journey, keep current within the second, then if I really feel like sharing after I return, I’ll. In fact there have been serendipitous moments the place I’ve posted from one other nation, solely to be taught a buddy was additionally there so we might meet up. It’s so enjoyable, but when I’m open to that subsequent time, I’ll put up forward of time that I’m going to a selected location within the hopes a buddy can also be there. TL; DR: I’m posting about my journeys after ought to I even resolve to do this.
Observe: you would exchange the phrase “trip” for dinners, buddy hangs, time with household, and so on. The most important query I contemplate is: am I current and being within the second proper now? As a result of it’s second I’ll by no means get again.
Why am I sharing this?
It is a query I ask myself typically. We overanalyze the reply, positive, however I additionally suppose it’s a sound query to mirror on. One factor I observed about leaders I like in knowledgeable capability is that they hardly ever use social media to share. They’re passive customers in that they pop on to see what is going on on the planet, however they hardly ever put up themselves.
These are the questions that information what I find yourself posting:
- Do I need to doc a second in time?
- Am I amplifying another person’s voice or work?
- Is what I’m sharing useful?
- Will this join or create neighborhood?
These are the issues I are likely to need to put up and share most about. And if the intention behind my posting doesn’t examine a kind of bins? I’ll fortunately simply maintain it to myself.
Are you partaking with individuals or pages that make you content?
If the reply is not any, your choices are easy: mute or unfollow. There have been pages or individuals I adopted due to a selected time or interval in my life. Working example: I’m nonetheless on my no-drinking way of life, so following pages of alcohol, or seeing individuals put up about themselves doing one thing cringe whereas drunk isn’t serving me at this second in life. So, I select to mute or unfollow. It’s in all probability the best boundary we will set for ourselves.
Make the most of Your Settings: Quiet Mode, Time Restrict, Flip Off Notifications
My life modified for the higher after I turned off my Instagram notifications. I had such a behavior of shortly responding the second somebody reached out or commented on a narrative or put up. In consequence, I felt like a prisoner to my feed and began to resent even being energetic on the platform. I’ve additionally set a time restrict, giving myself half-hour per day and make the most of Quiet Mode within the evenings so anybody that messages me is aware of I gained’t be responding. To me, this has been the most effective type of self-care.
What else might I be doing with my time?
I listened to this episode of Mel Robbin’s podcast just lately the place she had Dr. Kanojia (Dr. Okay) as a visitor. He’s a Harvard-trained psychiatrist specializing in trendy psychological well being and know-how’s influence on the mind. It’s a must-listen for everybody.
What actually hit me was once they talked about why we really feel drained the entire time. There are a lot of elements at play, however within the context of social media, we will attribute hours of scrolling and bingeing content material for killing our consideration span. Since I’ve listened to the podcast, anytime I’ve gone to seize my telephone to doom scroll, I’ve requested myself what else I might be doing? What could be extra productive? I’ll give myself a couple of minutes (really, a couple of minutes tops) to scroll, then I get to the duty at hand. In consequence, my productiveness has skyrocketed.
The Takeaway
Readers, I’m seeing a direct correlation between not ingesting and chopping again on social media utilization. When requested if I miss alcohol, I mirror on how I miss having a margarita on a scorching summer time day or a Spritz on a patio. However one margarita or Spritz wasn’t an issue, it was the a number of I’d have and the way I’d really feel the following day.
The identical has been true of my social media utilization. Spending 5-10 minutes on social media every day wasn’t the issue. As an alternative, it was the hours of scrolling, to not point out the best way it made me really feel. I’d typically finish these scrolling periods feeling that I used to be lacking out on one thing or negatively evaluating myself to others. That occasions takes me out of the current second and I fell sufferer to the eye economic system. And after I take into consideration the one second I’ve proper now—the current second—I need to be doing issues that make me really feel joyful, peaceable, fulfilled, and relaxed.
I can’t do away with social media, however I can management the way it matches into my life. I hope these prompts and concerns enable you as you be taught to navigate your social utilization and that they depart you feeling slightly lighter. Belief me: with out the load of others’ lives in your thoughts always, it’ll.
